Many people wonder why some immigrants prefer therapy in their first language. The answer is not always straightforward, but research suggests several possible explanations.
For some people, their first language is closely connected to childhood memories. At the same time, it may be connected to important relationships and cultural identity. Therefore, talking about emotional experiences may simply feel more natural in the language they grew up speaking. This is not necessarily related to being fluent in a second language. Many people are highly fluent in English and can communicate their thoughts, feelings, and experiences very well. Still, speaking in the language they grew up with can feel emotionally different.
For others, the opposite is true. Speaking in a second language can sometimes create enough emotional distance to discuss topics that feel uncomfortable or painful. For these individuals, talking in English may actually feel easier than speaking in their first language.
This is why there is no single “best” language for therapy. It is a highly individual experience.
As a therapist, I work with many Brazilian and Portuguese clients who are looking for therapy in Portuguese while living in Ontario. Some choose Portuguese because it feels more natural to talk about emotions in their native language. Others move naturally between Portuguese and English during sessions, depending on what they are talking about. What matters most is finding a space where you can express yourself authentically and feel understood.
This can look different across families as well. For example, in couples where each partner has a different first language, one person may find it much easier to express emotions or discuss conflict in one language rather than another. In other families, parents may feel more comfortable speaking Portuguese in therapy, while their children—who grew up in Canada—may naturally prefer English because it is the language they use at school, with friends, and in most areas of their daily lives.
These are important conversations to have with your therapist. Understanding your relationship with language can help create a stronger sense of safety and trust in therapy.
If you are looking for a therapist, language is certainly one factor worth considering, but it is only one of many. Feeling comfortable with your therapist, building trust, and finding an approach that fits your needs are all essential parts of effective therapy.
Whether you choose therapy in English, Portuguese, or another language, the goal is to find a space where you feel safe enough to explore your experiences, make sense of your emotions, and receive the support you need.
If you are looking for Portuguese therapy in Ontario, you can learn more about my approach here